snooze hit snooze again
wake up pull on some dirty clothes
run to the bathroom
prep a shot
cold shower
shrapnel digging into flesh
later dry hair
wringing out dregs of the banal
then abyssopelagic ecstasy
when i feel like that
i often feel what i feel
*
inventory: 70 mg valium
200 mg oxy
two angel feathers
60 mg klonopin
90 mg ambien
probably keep me together for another day
hold me
*
O oxy oxy my sphinx
i will answer
your riddles
i will kiss your paws
i will lick your sweat like
ground diamonds
O oxy oxy my lovely
chambermaid
wash me like linen sheets
run me under warm water
hang me out in the smiling sun
to dry
soften me use me up
like a bar of soap
O oxy oxy mother dearest
let me fall asleep
in front of the tv
unfinished green beans in my lap
i’m not hungry tonight
kiss me goodnight?
tuck the blankets
under my chin
O oxy oxy butylated
hydroxytoluene hypromellose
polyethylene glycol 400 polyethylene oxide
magnesium stearate
titanium dioxide
hydroxypropyl cellulose i love you
*
linoleum floor
linoleum floor linoleum floor linole
study closely the floor of
gas station bathroom
where i pulled up scored some
prepping a shot
study closely the floor
patterns of how i hurt how i hurt h
*
this room filled with soft shadows
plush carpets
creaky floorboards
whispering curtains
how many shots i’ve done
on this old bed?
never
enough