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the complexities of water 

by Lauren Lisk

the complexities of water  i was taught in water       to be fearless but take care       to not dive too deep or swim too shallow            and i wonder if that’s what i        am doing with you as your fingers stroke        me forwards and back until        i mistake my tears for  the ocean and my body       for a ripple i can’t control.      this time there is no  lifeguard to shout ‘stand up      put your foot down’          this time there is only – i was taught in class that      when the ground is too dry     it will flood and i wonder if that is what’s happening     to me as i stare and stitch   myself back up for you (even though i hate needles)   as you take my last few      drops of living until i empty and mistake a cage                        for your arms.                   this time i am too deep this time i can’t –                       i was taught in school           that water moulds to what is solid and i wonder if            that’s what i have become     as i grow inwardly to make  more space for you          as the mirror becomes the only       space i see myself as  more than a fraction           (for without you i am not whole)    it seems that i am now walking on shells                   in an island only i can see             so ‘you’ won’t crack and still my hands                          won’t pick up                         these pieces of me. this time is the last time               this time I won’t –                   i am learning in life that wounds will heal              with time and so i must wait        letting salt wrung my haggard breaths              head barely afloat and eyes         the colour of a  rusting fist as this time             i reach for the lifeboat                  instead of your hand.

About this poem

This poem is commended in August Challenge #3: Repetition & Imagery on Young Poets Network. This challenge was set and judged by Foyle Young Poet Ife Olatona in 2020.

Lauren Lisk

Lauren is a top 15 winner of the Foyle Young Poets of the Year Award 2020, and is commended in August Challenge #3: Repetition & Imagery on Young Poets Network.
Supported by Arts Council England

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