One Day

by Anja Livesey

Content warning: self-harm

One day
I woke up
Thinking maybe I’ll be a writer
And it never really went away
One day
I woke up
And thought maybe I’ll be a singer
That never really went away
One day
I woke up
Thought I’d fall in love with a friend
Try my hand at being gay
That never really went away
One day
I woke up
And I fell back asleep
And that never really went away
One day
In 2017
I woke up
And became a poet
Lapsed, perhaps
But a poet nonetheless
What a reoccurring nightmare
That turned out to be
But still it never really went away
One day
Was awful
And I didn’t sleep
So cut myself up
And the scars shine on my skin now
Papery thin, metallic
Tin-foil, machine-like
It’s horrifying how humanly
It rips
Though.
And that never really went away
I’ll keep waking up
Each morning
And that’ll never really go away