The other

by Amy Wolstenholme

do I remain      when I leave for good,
huddled in the corner of your brain,
           unwanted, chained,
quick, quick
            lock her up      get rid

am I embraced             do you have a
      synapse
dedicated to my name          that sparks
heady glutamate when I am mentioned
            casually
in conversation,           do you
       linger on the way I tie laces

am I mute        am I your voice of reason,
do I ever move unexpectedly
take you by surprise
in dreams, just when you were about to
            forget my existence

do I age           do you update
me like software or am I
still young in there, do you hold me
            undying
from nostalgia or         indifference

            who is that girl
            that lives on when I leave
is she irritating                        inspiring
how does she speak

or is she just                blue eyes
glancing away, a smile            on a
dark day, am I whole or am I
            broken

do I remain at all        
                          unspoken        

a breath           a lingering refrain
do you ever say
I wonder who this belongs to
I wonder if it was        that girl
I once knew    before
forgetting again